The Answer Is Never

Nice article, strange how, if you follow your own path and it is not the same as others….people get upset angry and of course, there must be something “wrong” with you!


Sabine Heinlein | Longreads | April 2015 | 16 minutes (3,886 words)

One time, when I was in my early twenties, I shared a hospital room with a mother of many. I had a skin infection that wouldn’t respond to oral medication, and the 50-something-year-old woman had severe, inexplicable hives. Our main topic of conversation revolved around neither of our ailments. It was about my not wanting to have children. She was insistent, which seemed ironic considering her hives flared up whenever her family visited her on Sundays. I eventually compromised with the woman. Okay, I said, I will put off my decision until I reach my thirties. “You are starry-eyed,” she huffed. “You young women want it all. But you can’t have it all!” Maybe, I thought, some of us don’t want it all.

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Why isn’t everyone talking about it??

You Would Have Thought, that with the incredible amount of people who have died, are dying in just about every situation possible, that with all that experience and information we could work out an educational syllabus called…

“A course on Dying – Everything you need to know”.

I have spent most of my life preparing for “accidental” death i.e. motorcycle accident, falling off a mountain, shot or blown up or some such unexpected and very quick event.  Well, seeing as I am writing this, none of those or anything similar actually happened so now I am faced with the image of the “grim reaper” waiting in the shadows, plotting my drawn out, much slower “death” experience.

After searching around the internet, I am amazed just how little there is written about death, sure, there is a lot about grief due to the departure of friends and loved ones, and I am not in anyway negating the trauma of that but almost nothing is said on how we, as individual human beings deal with, mentally, emotionally and physically the preparation, process and act of dying!

I find it hard to understand the “ignore it and it will go away” attitude which seems to be prevalent throughout western society.  Its coming to us all and for a lot of us “Baby Boomers”, sooner than later.

Even when, knowing our own death is reasonable imminent due to old age, terminal illness etc., there is pathetically little support available from any source except maybe if you are being charged around $70,000 per day for treatments that generally do not work.

In my opinion, any half civilized society, should care enough for themselves to educate and prepare everyone to face loss of loved ones from tragedy, accident or illness and also be prepared for their own demise.

Unfortunately, there is precious little, that I have seen, in the way of intelligent guidance or experience in this subject.

The fact that the people we generally turn to for help in these situations, (i.e. Church, Doctors, family members/friends , UMMM! can’t  think of anyone else can you?), are tied by belief systems, legal rules and regulations, emotional involvement and fundamentally no idea, vision or experience in truly helping someone come to terms with this event.

So, to whom should the responsibility fall?

I think the hardest part of dying, (my mother has dementia) is the period leading up to it.

For those who “stick their head in the sand” and ignore it until the day it arrives, fear, anger, disorientation, helplessness and loneliness/isolation and the longer the wait, the worse it is for all concerned.

I have a wonderful friend who is a nurse, she deals with death and dying all the time and receives many personal requests from inside and outside hospitals to help people through the process but as far as I know there are no positions, degrees, Phd’s or specialized job positions to fill the gap. Considering that EVERYONE is going to die sometime, why are we not coming together to accumulate and consolidate information and experience from all those who are involved in the experience of “death” and putting together a “job description”, course and qualifications for people to specialize in this work.  Keeping the “For Profit” vultures away should be priority so there should be no charge for this and would it not be a wonderful vocation for retired people to take on, they could apply and convert their theoretical knowledge into practical experience which obviously would also be for their own benefit.

😉 D

Scary Truth

Rapidly approaching my 12th year in the USA and my 60th Birthday, I reluctantly have to admit that the older

I get, the more certain I am of the Self-destructive, self inflicted, ignorant, Stupidity of the high majority of the Human Race!!

The height of “frustration”!

What the F… is wrong with everyone??

Has blatant “LYING” become so Integrated and OK in American Culture, Communication and Psyche that the majority of americans are no longer able to use the limited amount of intelligence to tell the difference between the Truth and a Blatant Lie??

Every aspect of our country, from politics through to the food we eat is poisoned by lies, and in some cases, literally!

Are we so de-sensitized that we just simply, no longer CARE??

Do we just feel battered and weakened by the continual onslaught to the point where we do not think we can do anything about it??

Let me tell you, YES you can!

The only way and/or reason that they keep doing and escalating these tactics is that YOU keep accepting it, not only accepting it but endorsing it by responding to the lies and “buying” in to their words or products.  Who do you think is “paying” for all that advertising, WE are, directly or indirectly we fund the lies and thereby the consequences.

What can you DO?

Make a list of every company and every person (outside of your family and friends of course..maybe 😉 ), and STOP interacting with them, on ANY level.

Corporations and companies and people will only “change”, if they are no longer profitable!

So, they only exist, because “we” the people choose to give them our time and money!

If you are running around blaming the Corporations, Government, politicians and everyone else for the state of our country, then perhaps its time you realized that you are funding all the things you so dislike!!


thoughts and enlightenment on our reality, life and death